Wait, let me guess. You can’t leave the house yet because you haven’t checked your horoscope for the day on that one last website that you usually check. You gotta check that before you leave. Your day won’t be the same without it! That brings us to why you are here. Here is a checklist of the top ten signs that you are one of those horoscopes junkies!
10. You have at least 25 daily horoscope websites bookmarked under your “favorites.” This does not include all the ones that you have bookmarked for weekly, monthly, and yearly horoscopes (yeah, I’m talking to YOU). You really just want to make sure you have all the bases covered and don’t miss a thing!
9. You have stayed home at least once in the past 6 months because your horoscope said you should “stay close to home today.” When explaining why you couldn’t go in to work that day you told your boss you had a “personal emergency.” Horoscoop
8. You are seriously considering starting a 12 step program for others like yourself who leave no horoscope stone unturned. You figure since everyone keeps telling you to find a program, you should just start your own.
7. You feel the innate need to text other people their daily horoscope just because you think that they “need to know!” When they complain about getting too much information, you feel hurt and silently swear to yourself that if they don’t care about their life, then you don’t either!
6. You left the house to go to the store. Halfway there you feel like you forgot something important. You have your keys and your wallet and you are dressed and have shoes on. Oh! Wait! You forgot to check your horoscope before leaving!
5. When you ask someone what sign they are, it’s not a pickup line. You are seriously concerned for their well-being and want to make sure that they know what to expect that day so that they don’t miss a minute of it! However, if you are single and they are single then you would OBVIOUSLY make sure that you were an astrological match before even considering going out for coffee with them!
4. You are CERTAIN that the person writing the horoscopes that you read daily MUST be your next door neighbor because they have such insight into your life! How else would they know that you need money now or are having a difficult time with something in your life?
3. You get offended if someone classifies horoscopes as “entertainment.” Entertainment? This is serious stuff! How dare you belittle it by calling it entertainment! Ugh! Some people!